Showing posts with label God. Show all posts
Showing posts with label God. Show all posts

Saturday 3 February 2024

I am looking up!



So the trip last Wednesday to pick out a bed and walker and then to finish some errands that were necessary saw me with a major fibromyalgia flare.

I had to go in person to chose the adjustable bed that will hopefully help me sleep better and bring down the swelling in my legs and feet. It was necessary to try out the various mattresses and models to make a good choice.

In the end, I chose a non divided queen size medium mattress with a padded bamboo topper. This should help with the fibro muscle pain and still support my sore back. 

After that I had to try out various walkers and walk around with it. It was exhausting.

This pulmonary hypertension is literally sucking the life out of me.  It is harder than ever to walk as my breathing is effected. That, plus the hole in my heart is leaching the oxygen out of my blood cells..It makes me suffer from dizzy spells and I have to grab onto something to stop falling over ..

So today and yesterday I have been sitting down a lot. Normally I sit in front of our kitchen window which is very sunny and has a good outlook. I love watching the white cabbage moths and the birds in our back yard. It sooths me as it's very relaxing. 

It's easy to be depressed. But I don't want to stay there. While there's life, there's hope. And speaking of hope, I have been praying and thanking God that I am His child. The hope of Jesus coming for His Church, His Bride in the Rapture is a real hope to cling to.  

His love and His promise to keep me and bring me to Himself keeps me going. And as I sit here in the window sunlight, you can be sure I am looking up.




Tuesday 26 December 2023

Not as I appear


We chronically ill women try so hard to do "normal" things. Like look well. Be cheerful. Be patient. Kind. Hospitable.

Our family and marriage are our first priority after God. We try so hard to spin our wheel not fast- but at a "normal" pace. By "normal", we compare ourselves to those who do not suffer from chronic illness and pain. Or are disabled.

We are very careful to keep serving our family but sometimes with the illness that afflicts us: we fail. This often gets to us and causes us to sink into depression.

Being unable to process that we simply can't act as "normals", we often berate ourselves and sink into the Pit of Despair. 

We are often judged by "normal" standards, as we simply cannot attend certain social functions like before. If we do, the pain and effort can make us tense and we can make us appear moody unsociable grumps aka the death head at the feast. 

If only "normals" would realise that we are pushing ourselves every day to live a life that not even closely is "normal" like in the days before our health failed. We get so adept at doing this, that we have become quite good at wearing masks to cover the Mask Of Pain. Hence the appearance of being in a mood. 

My fibromyalgia and other health issues have now made it impossible for me to disguise, and I have learned to acknowledge this to people and tell them in advance that my attendance or action or whatever is totally subject to how I am on any given day.

Basically, I have had to pander to injured knees, angina, spinal problems, fibromyalgia, polymyalgia rheumatica, and submit to tyrannical spoons by being totally flexible about my appointments and so on.

People may still misjudge me but that is not my problem. I just pray that the LORD will allow them to see that I am not lazy or unsociable, but am just a chronically ill woman who finds just breathing some days enough effort.

The LORD knows I am not well, but people take a lot more convincing. I am not as I appear: I am not "normal".


 © Glenys Robyn Hicks    


Put on therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, bowels of mercies, kindness, humbleness of mind, meekness, longsuffering;  Colossians 3:12

Tuesday 12 December 2023

Sufficient to the day

 

As  a woman who suffers from chronic illness and pain through fibromyalgia,  I often succumb to bouts of depression. I have a few tips on overcoming it. 

First and foremost, start your day in prayer. Ask God for the strength to face the day and play worship music to lift your spirit.

Try to be in the moment and take one day at a time. That's all we can tackle otherwise, the sense of failure can be overwhelming. We aren't meant to take it on all at once.

If you try to just focus on the next task at hand and not dwell on the future, it will help your attitude to realise that you have accomplished something. It will then snowball as you progress through the day.

With chronic illness, I set myself just one or two daily goals that are achievable: for me it is wash the dishes and put away the clean clothes. I only focus on those goals that I know are achievable and if at the end of the day, they are done, then I feel a sense of accomplishment instead of defeat.

Nothing depresses me more than a feeling that I have achieved nothing all day. I don't worry that others may say "for goodness sake, it's only washing dishes..." for us in the throes of illness, be it mental or physical- it's a big deal. Delight yourself in small victories.

I find that in setting small goals it knocks the cloud of gloom off its perch and makes me hopeful that I will be able to rise above the depression. Give yourself a high five and see that any job you do is a step in the right direction. It still blesses your family and serves the LORD. 

I think when we are depressed and/or in pain, the desire to go Home to the LORD is strong. After all, we are tired of living in a world of pain and we look forward to our redemption. But in saying that, we still have a work to do until that time. 

As FlyLady says, baby steps. But just taking baby steps lead us out of our rut and it is that first baby step that will hasten our healing of depression and sense of failure. 


© Glenys Robyn Hicks


 Sufficient to the day is the evil thereof. Matthew 6:34 

Thursday 30 November 2023

God's got this!

 



So the specialist's receptionist just rang me with my appointment for Monday. It's midday. 

He wants to do a stress test on the bicycle but I can't because of my ligaments being torn in my knees. My last chemically induced exercise test saw them do a code blue for me as it gave me a heart attack. 

So I said no to that and to angiograms.. it's kind of freeing to know that I get to call the shots in my life... it's sad that I got to old age before I said no to doctors... anyway, he waived the $300 fee for video consultation yesterday. Medicare will pay him. So I am very happy and relieved about that...

Thanks to God, I can relax, God's got this! 




Thursday 23 November 2023

"We give You thanks"

                                          


"We Give You Thanks"

Lord, as we gather at this table
May we be truly grateful
For the bounty You have given us.
We thank you for the earth and rain,
The good harvest and the wholesome grain
That went into our daily bread
And kept the stock that kept us fed.
Thank you for the hands that cooked and baked,
And for the water that our thirst slaked.
Please accept our thanks as we honour You
For Your goodness in giving us this food.

© Glenys Robyn Hicks

By him therefore let us offer the sacrifice of praise to God continually, that is, the fruit of [our] lips giving thanks to his name. Hebrews 13:15

Wednesday 10 August 2022

Stating your name and business



As you know, we have just moved and along with a new home, comes some new things to add to the decor.

Chris and I love this door mat. This verse is one of our favourites and when we saw it we wanted it. It can be personalised to add your family name.

It looks lovely at the front door. We still have pictures to be hung and some flat packs of furniture to make up. The unpacking itself is almost finished.

The plan is to gradually go through room to room and gradually declutter. But this will depend on my spoons. I have another fibromyalgia flare.

But we have been finding that even a concerted effort of 5 minutes at a time followed by a rest and a cup of tea has paid off. Pacing is critical with fibromyalgia and heart failure.

I am in the process of getting an i-Roomba robotic vacuum cleaner to help with the floors. This house is quite large and the passage alone is as long as a cricket pitch...

Neither Chris or I can vacuum these days and I am hoping that the i-Roomba will save on money to employ a helper to come clean the house for me. I will let you know how we go.

Happily, the robotic vac can manage both tiles and carpet without skipping a beat, so it will be able to keep our lovely door mat free of dust bunnies. 

Meant to be noticed, I don't want visitors to our home seeing the mat dirty- not when it's proclaiming our faith and intention of having a holy home. It's all about stating your name and business! 


Monday 8 August 2022

We really like our new house

 


I pushed myself today to do some work and unpack. I know it's not the best thing I can do with a fibromyalgia flare, but I need to get my home organised. We are about two-thirds unpacked. 

But of course the cooking, cleaning, dishes and washing have to be kept up and I managed to get the kitchen cleaned and a load of washing done. 

My daughter Dianne came home from hospital after her knee replacement. She's doing really well, praise God. 

Chris isn't feeling too great so I have to wait for the heavier things to be unpacked. We really like our new house.

Monday 18 April 2022

He works in mysterious ways!



So last Thursday I ordered my online Easter grocery shop. The driver had just taken off after delivering our order and immediately on starting to put it away, I noticed a bag that I hadn't ordered.

In it were four packets of frozen Hoki fish fillets and 2 packets of sweet potato fries and 2 packets of sea salt and rosemary chips.

I quickly rang the supermarket online customer service. There was a wait of an hour to talk to a human, so I "talked" to the AI bot there called Olive.

Olive was of no use to me. She told me to keep the goods as it was the supermarket's fault and accept them with their compliments.

The bot also told me there were no deliveries the next day as it was Good Friday, so obviously there was no way to get the bag of frozen foods to the correct purchaser.

I felt quite sad for the lady as I imagine this was what she had planned to feed her family Good Friday. I had done all I could but I couldn't help but feel sorry for her. I had been in a similar situation last Christmas and it's not nice.

I hope the lady was able to rustle up something else for Good Friday. Seeing as I have the fish and chips here I plan to use them Wednesday when family come up for lunch.

With my fibromyalgia flaring and a recurrence of polymyalgia rheumatica, I don't want to be cooking as I am out of spoons and in pain.

During this particular time, we had no spare money for extras which included Easter eggs for the grandchildren. They get plenty of chocolate, so they won't go without, but it was a bit difficult to not be able to give them any this year.

That extra food will come in handy as I haven't done another weekly shop and can't until next week. I guess the LORD has provided for our needs and for that I am grateful. He does work in mysterious ways sometimes! 




 

Sunday 13 February 2022

Being saved is crucial if you want to live.



For those of us who regularly read the Bible, it is very apparent that even though we read of a powerful God Who chastises and punishes the wicked, we also see a kind, patient, lovingly holy God Who is full of mercy. 

The fact that God is merciful and holy is woven throughout scripture, both in the Old and the New testaments, and those who only see a harsh, punitive God have not truly read the Bible with an open heart and mind. 

Mercy, grace, justice, love, honour, fairness and compassion are hallmarks of our God Who loved us all enough to send His only Son to die for us when we were still sinners and unloving and unkind. 

The very Laws laid down in the 10 Commandments and then in Leviticus reveal a God Who knows what is best for His creation, and Who longs to teach His Children so that they will not only thrive but be holy. 

When we study the Word, a beautiful picture of our God is shown us through the Word and through His Son Jesus. He embodies the qualities of the Holy Spirit, Who Himself is the third Person of the Godhead. Here is an example of the mercy of God.

Do not let the son of the foreigner who has joined himself to the Lord speak, saying, “The Lord has utterly separated me from His people”; nor let the eunuch say, “Here I am, a dry tree.” For thus says the Lord: “To the eunuchs who keep My Sabbaths,and choose what pleases Me, and hold fast My covenant, even to them I will give in My house and within My walls a place and a name better than that of sons and daughters; I will give [a]them an everlasting name that shall not be cut off". Isaiah 56:3-5

Love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, self-control and mercy are all qualities of the goodness of our God. He is in fact the totality of holiness

It is because of God's Holiness, in that He is the essence and being of the above qualities is why He sent His Son to become sin in our place for He cannot abide with evil. Therefore, it is impossible to come into the Presence of God except through Jesus Christ. We must be born again or saved or we will not go to heaven.

We all know the world is getting darker and soon Jesus is coming in the clouds to take His Church- believers. If you are not saved, you will be left behind to face a great tribulation such as the world has never seen before. Salvation is still possible because God is merciful but man is not. Your salvation will come at a great price: you will lose your life.

If you are not saved, know that the Holy Spirit is wooing you and longing for you to accept Jesus. Today is the day of salvation: the Holy Spirit says, "Come!"


© Glenys Robyn Hicks


For with the heart man believeth unto righteousness; and with the mouth confession is made unto salvation. Romans 10:10

Thursday 27 January 2022

We live in a fallen world




 I have tried not to dwell on my illnesses these days, but still find that I have to remember to do this:

Accepting that one's life is going to be difficult due to ongoing illness makes for a happier life. When the chronically ill person decides to give it to God, and to cling to Him instead of succumbing to false guilt, life takes on a normality in what many would see as anything but. It is a surrender, if you will.
Suffering does not make us second-class Christians, as some false teachings would purport. Nor does it mean we are faithless or aren't reading our Bibles or standing on the promises of God regarding healing.
Furthermore, being ill does not check us out of God's watchful Eye of concern, or mean that He is an uncompassionate God. No, we all are subject to frailties and problems in the flesh because we live in a fallen world... we have not been singled out to suffer...
God has given us things to do in our suffering and it is important that we stay close to Him and continue to read the Word and pray. It is not that God has moved, when He feels far away during a flare or illness, but our emotions are also hurting as a result of our condition.
It is important to pray that God heal us, and to ask the Church to anoint us with oil according to the Scriptures... It is essential to our emotional and spiritual health to stay in the faith and believe that God can heal us, but to pray for strength until- or even IF it is His will to do so.
I know that should/when another flare comes for me that I will have to cling to Jesus and reread what I have written here (for I write it for myself as well as you). I will need to surrender this next painful chapter of my life, knowing that God will still be there for me.
Surrendering our pain and our life to God is the only thing we can do.... meanwhile, I thank Him for the few days of respite..

Suffering is not our fault, but is because we live in a fallen world.


© Glenys Robyn Hicks



Beloved, I pray that you may prosper in all things and be in health, just as your soul prospers. 3 John 1:2

Monday 17 January 2022

Our little haven

 


So yesterday was a day of horrible fibromyalgia pain and fatigue. I felt a little down so I came to my couch and sat next to Chris for a cuddle and rest. 

We love feeding the birds that come into our back garden and all through the day, our garden is like an airport. Birds of all types come to dine and drink and it is so restful and fun to watch them.

They have their own little antics and natures and they can be quite amusing. And apart from watching their different natures and antics they have something else that we find very attractive: they have babies.

It's such fun to watch the mothers feeding their babies and to watch the babies venture further and further from her as they learn to feed themselves. They fly but are still juvenile and yesterday their mothers were distancing themselves from their chicks and refusing to feed them, much to their annoyance. 

The magpie juveniles are especially raucous and squawk even with food in their mouth. They are almost always feeding. The minor bird mummy also is weaning her chicks from her and as soon as she moves away, they follow like the duckling family juveniles do. So fun to watch.

But by far, my favourite birds are the Kingfishers which have also had babies. Whilst laying on the couch, I can see outside and I was delighted to see a mother Kingfisher with one of her three babies on our garden swing.

They were watching the porch which was covered in birdseed for the galahs and rosellas. I had thrown out some cut up luncheon meat, and they were waiting for the magpies to vacate the porch so that they could dine. Kingfishers are shy and besides, magpies are three times their size. So they wait.

It is the season for little white cabbage moths too. They are flying around the agapanthus plants and I guess they are mating because they seem to be in pairs. As are the pigeons that come for the seed.

There are three that regularly call in and partake of the parrot seed on the ground. There's a little female who just wants to eat, but there also is an amorous male who has romance on his mind. He pursues her constantly and hopes to make her his by dancing for her. 

He fans out his tail feathers and hops towards her, then takes a few steps back. He repeats this courting gesture until she tires of him and runs a few feet away. But he is insistent and pursues her over and over again. I hope that he wins her heart as it is such fun to  watch the young birds as they leave the nest under their mothers supervision.

We have a bird bath/feeder in the back garden which we used to fill with seed, but now with torn meniscuses in both knees, I cannot get down the steps to fill it, so they get fed from the back sliding glass door. I just toss the food onto the back porch. They don't care where it is. 

They are quite used to me now and I have them almost eating out of my hand. So much so that as soon as I open the door, they come flying in to the garden from all directions, calling each other.

We have water in the bird feeder and in a plastic container in front of the steps. They bathe and drink and sing and they enjoy our back garden as much as we do.

It's a lovely place to recoup one's spoons during a fibromyalgia flare. The daily scenes are so peaceful and we love our little haven and we know the birds think of it as their haven as well. Their constant visits and frequent broods of chicks speaks of a place of plentiful food, water and safety.

We are grateful God lead us to this little country town- it is a gift from Him: our little haven



Thursday 22 July 2021

Drowning in fear?


 




For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life. John 3:16   Click here to become a Christian 

Wednesday 14 July 2021

Like, sure that will work!


As you know, I really love watching the many birds that come into our back garden, and I feed them all the time.

Xena our cat also watches them, but I am not sure what her motives are! Anyway, they have gotten used to her sitting watching them and they eat freely in front of her.

Of all the birds, my favourite are the kingfishers and I always leave a treat for them on the actual porch. The others eat further down near the bird feeder, but the kingfishers always come up checking for treats.

It started out with one brown kingfisher, but now there are about four brown ones and two black and white.

No matter where they are, I have my "love glances" from the LORD. He always causes me to turn round or look up just as they appear. He is so loving and good! 

It is winter here and we have rain which exacerbates my fibromyalgia. So today I am planning on just doing my dishes and cooking. Pork chops with mashed potato and salad are on the menu for tonight.

My knee is still so sore and I feel like my polymyalgia rheumatica is coming back. I am toying with the idea of putting myself back on my Prednisolone. We will see.

With opioids being so restricted and my paracetamol aka Tylenol being practically useless, I am going to try to distract myself watching the birds and taking my mind off it. Like, sure that will work! 




Sunday 9 August 2020

And Baby makes three!

 

For the first time in ages, I have a few spoons and I have been having a few days of respite from my fibromyalgia flare.

It is forecast to rain over the next few days, and the weather is cold, so I probably will find this respite all too brief. But, we live in hope.

I have been taking stock of our pantry and fridge because many abattoir workers have been taken ill with the virus and only one abattoir in Victoria remains empty. Which means that there will soon be a shortage of meat and in particular, mince.

Also here the Covid cases are mounting fast and we have been given stay at home orders. So I will be doing my grocery shopping online. I want to make sure I rotate the food we have and don't over buy on things. So that is my plan for today.

I have some bread dough proofing and I will bake that for tonight. I will be serving crumbed fish, mash and salad with it for dinner.

My washing and dishes are up to date and that makes me happy. In fact, I am very happy up here despite the quarantine.

I love our home here in the country and I feel very happy and grateful to God for giving us this home. If one has to be under lockdown, I can't think of a nicer place to do it.

Xena is happy here as well. It's been cold lately but we have turned the heater off as the sun comes in the back sliding door and warms the lounge room nicely.

Obviously not enough for Xena who spotted Chris's new Oodie on the couch, and so decided to make a little nest in it for herself. 

I have a pink one, Chris has a navy one. Best money I ever spent. We love them and it looks like with Xena, that Baby makes three! 


Thursday 23 July 2020

In my dreams!


Ever since I was a young girl, I have dreamed of being an energetic housewife, baking and cooking from scratch. I would keep an immaculate house as well and my washing would be as white as snow.

Of course, I would iron everything that was on the line and my pantry shelves would be well organised with the spices kept in alphabetical order. And it was so for the first two years of my first  marriage.

But then much sickness came into my life, heralded by displaced discs and Scheurmann's Disease, and the dream evaporated as quickly as my energy and eroded discs.

This dream kept springing back in fits of discontent with myself and no small amount of false guilt. With the onset of heart disease, diabetes and fibromyalgia, the dream became a nightmare that taunted me. 

Perfectionism pointed its' knobbly finger at me, taunting me and demanding I try harder. It insisted that I find my worth in my homemaking abilities as a woman, and I was miserable as well as in pain.

It took until I was into my 20th year with fibromyalgia to realise that my worth as a woman was not on how well I kept my house. 

I decided to focus on the fact that God loves me just as I am and that helped remove the false guilt.

So now, in my 67th year, and my maladies worsening, I have had to put the dream to rest. I am never going to be the woman of my dreams. I have someone come to clean for me once every two weeks and I have learned to be grateful.

Only in accepting your illness can you find peace. Our womanhood is not only about keeping an immaculate house. And as I look at my clean house today, I am glad that we have the Aged care package that allows home care help. 

As I talk to you now, I smile at the irony: my energy comes through the woman who cleans, and my home is still clean. I have a maid in my later years- and that's something I thought would only come to be in my dreams! 

Today's lists of to do's are:

Make our bed
Do a load of washing
Fold yesterday's clothes
Make a sweet curry stew with rice for dinner


Monday 20 July 2020

Watch, pray and wash your hands.


So this Corona Virus is getting serious here Down Under. In our home state, Victoria, people have been dropping like flies after a whiff from the can of Mortein. 

Melbourne and metropolitan towns have been told to stay at home and even  we in the rural areas have been asked to limit our business outside the home.

Masks are becoming mandatory after midnight Wednesday for those in lockdown and we here have been requested to comply. 

We had  a telephone consult about our three monthly blood tests and although Chris's sugars at 9.2 have come down, there's room for improvement. He has to double his Januvia tablets.

My sugars were 8 which our doctor has said was good but could be better. I do have a high GTT on my liver report. Just another thing to worry about, I suppose. Kidney function is good. Cholesterol is fine too.

I don't get much sun as I am inside mainly so not surprisingly, my vitamin  D is low. I am to take 2 Vit D tablets from now on to give it a boost.

Due to comorbidities, Chris and I have been told to wear a mask when shopping etc. I accordingly bought some on ebay today because it is cheaper than the chemist.

I am experiencing some itchy hands from the constant hand sanitisers when we leave the house. I know they are important, and I do use them, but I use soap and water at home.

It's just another cross to bear with fibromyalgia vying for top place in the itching field. My hands usually only itch after I clap my hands. 

But all in all, we have to stay vigilant to stay safe, so I will do as I am told. We have faith in God, but have to have a teachable heart with matters like Corona.

So we keep social distancing, and we watch and pray, and wash our hands. 


Monday 13 July 2020

Beauty is all around us


As you probably know, we love cats. We used to have two white cats, but Snowy passed at age 14 and we now have our little white cat, Xena left to love. Both of them were rescue cats.

Xena has brightened my day. She is so amusing. Thinking she is invisible, she crouches after the many birds in our back garden, only to dash back inside when they gang up on her and chirp her away.

She is not very brave or wise. Her white fur is visible to everything. Her demeanour is the yellow of a coward. This is the same cat who squealed when a mouse ran over her paw! She's such a girl! 

With isolation, one has time to watch the antics of cats and birds, and to enjoy the beauty that is all around us. For in spite of pestilence and mayhem, there is still beauty to be found.

It does help me with this current fibromyalgia flare, to go to "the beach" and let the sun play on my skin and listen to the birds and watch our cats' antics.

Not many people can find much beauty in the world today, but I make a point of looking for it- and when I find it, I make sure to thank the One Who made it, and give thanks.

Gratitude and thankfulness in the midst of pain goes a long way in coping mentally with it all. 

Try to take some time out and focus on the good that remains in this sad old world. There is beauty all around us.


Sunday 14 June 2020

Strine's a language all its own.


They say English is the hardest language to learn, but I think good old Aussie slang called Strine, is harder still.

We Australians have a unique language which causes problems to even English speakers who aren't in the know.

It is funny to speak Strine amongst ourselves and we delight in shortening words, names and places.
For example, when speaking of the Corona Virus we call it Rona. The town of Mordialloc is Mordy, Broadmeadows is Broady, and Dandenong is Dandy.

I am having a lot of fun teaching my English husband how to speak Strine. He's been naturalised and has almost lost his English accent and has lived in Australia longer than England now. But every now and then, a new Strine word will come up and he asks me for the interpretation.

"Got a bingle (crash) out in Broady (Broadmeadows)... towies (towtrucks) on site but as a result it's chockers (bumper to bumper or full) in that direction"  There now,can't be any clearer can it? lol

Today I am catching up on dishes and washing. I will be serving chicken parmigana with mashed potato and greens for dinner.

I am so glad that the Bible comes in easy to read language: something that can speak to all of us and not just a select few. I just can't see a Bible written in Strine as something that would minister to all men because as I said, Strines' a language all its own.


Friday 12 June 2020

Let's be clever ducks!


So I am at  the "beach" again today... just watching out the window as the sun hid behind a tree. In the paddock behind our property, a little family of ducks waddled across towards the stream. One by one with a big plop, they threw themselves in and were rapidly whisked away on the current, probably ending up at the larger town twenty kilometres away.

With world events on my mind, I thought of how quickly we can all be whisked away to a future world we don't really enjoy or even like much any more.  It is dark and frightening for most of us-and especially so for the non believer in Christ.

For Christians have a hope and expectation: we are expecting and waiting for Jesus to come for us, and so we will be forever with Him, away from the anger and wrath that awaits the world. 

Whether we like it or not, we are being whisked away on a flood of rushing water and where we end up for eternity depends on whether or not we accept Jesus Christ as our LORD and Saviour

No good works will make us good enough to go to Heaven: Jesus Christ is the ONLY way. 

My prayer today as I watch those ducks making use of that current is that we will all be found safe at the other end with Jesus. Let's be clever ducks!


Nor is there salvation in any other, for there is no other name under heaven given among men by which we must be saved. —Acts 4:12

Thursday 11 June 2020

From the comfort of my couch


Today when I woke up, the outside was like a winter wonderland. Everything had a cloak of white from the frost. I quickly put the heaters on and warmed the place up.

After my lunch, I was still in my Oodie and I just didn't really have any spoons to do much. The birds were eating in our bird feeder and the sun had come across the back garden and was so warm that I was able to turn the heater off.

My stress levels when Chris became ill were pretty high, and I had done a lot of driving over the last two weeks. It played major havoc with my fibromyalgia, back and hips. I don't usually drive so of course I was using muscles that don't get used much. And they were complaining!

We opened the back door to air the house. The birds were chirping, the cattle were lowing and the stream at the end of our garden was flowing fast and bubbling. The sun shone on the water and not for the first time, I thanked God for giving us this home to rent.

Chris was sitting at the end of the couch and invited me to lay down and he would give me a foot rub. Now with all the driving, my right foot was extremely sore from using the pedals, and my peripheral neuropathy from diabetes was causing my feet to burn. He knows I suffer with sore feet and oedema in my legs, thanks to heart failure, and he rubs my feet and massages the water from them up towards my heart. It is supposed to help with heart failure.

The sun was shining right in my eyes, so I pulled my Oodie hood over them and lay listening to the birds, cows and stream. With closed eyes and the sun shining on my bare legs, the birds continued to chorus and with the water running, it felt exactly like I was at the beach. I fell asleep.

When I woke from my resultant slumber, Chris had closed the door as it was getting cold again. My muscles felt more relaxed and I had a few spoons to cook some fish and mashed potato with peas for dinner. I even did an apple pie sweetened with Hermasetas and cinnamon.

I was so comforted by just getting to rest and sleep and I intend to go to the "beach" again tomorrow- all from the comfort of my couch!