Silly season's begun already

 

This year because we finally have a larger home, I am hosting Christmas Day lunch. As always, I need to plan and pace myself because of my chronic fatigue, so I am looking into buying my foods and gifts early.

I know I am going to have a fibromyalgia flare by Boxing Day, but it will be worth it to have some good memories. Sometimes you just have to push yourself or you never do anything. I am looking forward to it! But to minimise any major flare after Christmas and leading up to it, I am planning already!

Last weekend our 10 year old granddaughter Taylah came and she loves Christmas and decorating, so we gave her the tree and decorations and told her if she wants, she can decorate it. She wanted to!

So except for Grandpa Chris holding her to place the star, she did it all by herself. We think she did a sterling job!

To be honest, if we weren't hosting lunch this year, we probably wouldn't be bothered with the tree but with family coming, it seemed worth the effort. So the tree is up albeit early. With both of us feeling under the weather, and with a little willing helper, it is cheerful and jolly. And good timing!

Taylah placed the solar lights so that the tree turns on at dusk and turns off at dawn. So there's no upkeep and even though the tree is minimalist by most standards, it still heralds in the festive season.

All we have left to do for decorating is putting the wreath on the front door, but it seems a little too soon to go public yet and let everyone know that at Hicks' House, the silly season's begun already!

Here a little.

 

So today I woke with no spoons and I felt like I had been hit by a bus. But I really want to start this journey of reclaiming my house, so I bit the bullet and took my first step.

As the kitchen is always the first area that calls for attention, I decided to start there. I had cleaned up last night and only had a few dishes to take out of the dishwasher.All I had to clean up was the breakfast and morning tea dishes.

Fibromyalgia flares see that I simply can't do mornings, and as you can see, I couldn't raise a gallop until nearly lunchtime. All I had managed to do was pull up our beds, put a load of washing in and run my irobot, Sadie.

So by the time I had done the kitchen, it was time for a nana nap as my angina was playing up and I was finding just breathing enough.

So I had a nana nap which lasted a few hours, and I came out again but I still had no spoons to speak of.

My plan was to wipe down the kitchen benches or counter tops and start preparing dinner, but I had to leave it for the moment. Chris made me a cup of tea, we discussed what we would eat tonight and I sat down to talk to you.

I realise most people would say that I haven't accomplished a lot, but believe me, when you wake with no spoons at all, it is a lot. I know the benches need wiping down, but basically the kitchen's clean and I can start on cooking dinner as soon as I recoup.

I don't allow myself to suffer from "false guilt" anymore and I don't allow myself to be dictated to by my OCD perfectionist healthy woman of the past. She doesn't exist anymore. 

Everything we do is kudos to us Sacrificial Home Keepers. We push ourselves to achieve little by the standards of "normals", but to us, we have run a marathon.

So in a minute after I post this post, I will be cooking sweet and sour pork and rice. And then I will pray for enough spoons to see me sort the kitchen out- I hate getting up to a dirty kitchen and if I can do it before bed, it will be a gift from my previous self to my future self.

Tonight is bin night, so I will help Chris gather the rubbish and put the bins out. Come to think of it, they go out more often than we do these days! But it is what it is! With no spoons for both of us, staying home is a pleasure.

Anyway, I have at least achieved something today- working. pacing. resting. planning. It all adds up with here a little, there a little in the daily life of this Australian Sacrificial Home Keeper.

Planning already

This year because we finally have a larger home, I am hosting Christmas Day lunch.

As always, I need to plan and pace myself because of my chronic fatigue, so I am looking into buying my foods and gifts early.

Currently I am investigating if I can freeze a joint of ham and one of pork. Also, what type of ham is the nicest to buy?

I know I am going to have a fibromyalgia flare by Boxing Day, but it will be worth it to have some good memories.

Sometimes you just have to push yourself or you never do anything. I am looking forward to it! But to minimise any major flare after Christmas and leading up to it, I am planning already!

Cats have never been very considerate

This morning I hit the floor running. Xena woke me with imminent chucks and I shooed her off my bed, but not before she soiled both my minkie blankets. 

She also soiled the carpet in my bedroom. I have the blankets in the wash as we speak. The carpets have been cleaned and sprayed with Glen 20. 

I love her dearly, but often tell myself there will be no more cats when she passes. She's 12 now. We will have to wait and see on that one!  

So far since that, I have folded and put away 3 loads of clean washing, made lunch and cleaned my kitchen.

Tonight I am doing frozen dinners as we had a big lunch. Apart from that, I will be resting as my fibromyalgia is still flaring.

Now Xena is peacefully sleeping in her igloo. It would have been so much more Mummy friendly to have sicked up in that. A simple matter of washing out a little mattress. Still, cats have never been very considerate have they?

Of rosy cheeks and apple roses

This weekend we had our 10 year old granddaughter, Taylah come and stay with us. We had a lot of fun and part of that fun was making apple roses.

My fibromyalgia was really bad and I explained my need for a nana nap by relating the meaning behind the spoons. She totally understood and in fact told me to go have a nap and she would call me in half an hour.

True to her word, she woke me in half an hour, but my body whimpered and said, "No way!" However, because we had made a "pinky promise" and I wanted to keep it, I dragged myself out of bed.

We stayed up until 11 on Saturday night because it wasn't a school night, and we slept until midday. I couldn't believe that I had slept that long. Tay must have needed it too.

We baked  apple roses and kept some aside for when her mum and sister came to pick her up. It was the first time they had seen our new house. I rarely see them these days. 

I was happy that we had made more memories when I said goodbye to them and so was my little Tay, looking lovely and rosy cheeked, clutching a few more apple roses for them to enjoy later.

For me, it's spoons!

It's Sunday morning here. I have brought in the online groceries and checked them off and put them away. 

I will soon be taking Chris's bloods and doing breakfast. Breakfast will be eggs and bacon and a cup of tea. Lunch will be ham and salad sandwiches. For dinner, I am doing a vegetable intensive beef stew. Fresh fruit for desert.

There's a hamper of clean clothes to fold and then I will be up to date with washing. Later I plan to make some coleslaw, if spoons permit. 

That's about it for today, except for cooking dinner. I don't want to put myself into another fibromyalgia flare or I won't have spoons to help my daughter tomorrow. As I always say: most jugglers juggle balls, for me it's spoons! 

A big part of my life

It's 11.30 Saturday morning here and already we have been to have blood tests, come back and had breakfast and I have done a load of washing, folded clothes and stacked the dishwasher. 

They weren't able to get blood from me today so I have to come back Monday. This in spite of drinking water beforehand. 

Chris is sleeping and I am thinking of having a nana nap as I have no spoons left. So tonight I will be cooking pork chops with mashed potato and salad. I may serve a fruit salad for dessert.

The fibromyalgia is flaring and I am aching all over. I haven't recovered from the move yet. In spite of knowing I could/should do some more around the house, I know that I need to rest or tomorrow will be a repeat of today. Pacing and resting are now a big part of my life since fibro.

I think I could sleep on the freeway.

We visited the doctor today.  I have extremely high blood pressure which the doctor feels is due to my fibromyalgia pain.  It has flared since the move and I have gone grey overnight.

He is increasing my antidepressants as I am stressed to the max. He believes they may help in my fibro pain. He has not offered anything for pain as yet. 

I feel totally exhausted and I need to help Dianne for the next month as she can't drive.  My spoons are gone before I surface each day.

My exhaustion is such that my legs feel like they can't hold me up. Yet like helping my daughter and looking after my sick husband, there are things that just have to be done.

My grandson walked to our place from school today and found no clean cups for a drink. I told him he will have to wash one out for himself as I have been so unwell that I haven't been able to stack the dishwasher.  

He selected a picnic cup instead of washing one and then asked to be driven home. I felt guilty that my kitchen is a mess but Chris has fluid build up in his lungs due to living with heart failure and hasn't been able to help.

As a fellow counter of spoons, he has to save them for driving Dianne to doctors' appointments and physio, so I do not ask that he helps with the housework.

My extra antidepressants are kicking in and I am feeling tired as we speak. I must straighten my bed first as it is very uncomfortable as it is. I need a good night's sleep.

It is true that you sleep better in a tidy bed. The way I feel right now, I think I could sleep on the freeway. 

I am too tired to shout!

Today is Monday morning. I have to do some washing and restack the dishwasher. I have run Sadie the Roomba and am about to do bloods, meds and breakfast. 

Later on at 11 a man is coming to do some flatpacks of furniture for us. I am hopeless at this and Chris can't do it anymore. It's a coffee table and TV lowline unit. It's $40 an hour but we had to factor that in when we bought them. It is what it is! 

At 2.30 we have to pick Dianne up and take her to a doctor's appointment. Then I have to go to the chemist and get her meds made up. 

It's supposed to rain for the next 10 days and the rain has been consistently heavy and constant. I think we are going to need an ark soon.  It is making my fibromyalgia worse, and I am pushing myself to get Di to doctors and physio. 

I will neverthless be busy with doctors and physio for the rest of the week and possibly next two weeks or more. I am glad Di's knee has been done though. It's all over bar the shouting! With no spoons at all, I am too tired to shout! 

You just got to pass it on!

I ran our new irobot roomba vacuum last night. Xena hated it and ran under the bed. Roomba chased her under it and she came out like a scalded cat and bushy tailed. 

Don't worry, she got lots of cuddles afterwards, but it was the funniest thing that's happened in a long time. 

I highly recommend a roomba. It's very easy to operate and manages interchanging between carpets and tiled floors. It's really great when you have cats or dogs as it gets the fur vacuumed up easily. 

Last night ours kept bumping into things as my phone is too old to download the app to schedule and program it. It still did a great job. I am keen to see how much better it does when I update my phone.

We are just staying home this weekend as there's going to be a few days of physios and doctors for Dianne next week. Being oldies, we are bushed! But ya gotta do what ya gotta do! Fibro flare or not!

I am not getting paid for advertising roomba but when you find something that helps with fibromyalgia and other chronic illnesses, you just have to pass it on! 

A nasty dictator

 

Yesterday was a very busy day and I am feeling the after effects now. My fibromyalgia is flaring and the pain is incredible. 

Dianne my daughter was not able to get the staples out from her total knee replacement because the doctors and nurse said a week out of surgery is too early to remove them- especially on a bending joint. We had to reschedule to next Thursday. 

Then I was not allowed to accompany her into physio because I am not vaxxed against covid. So I helped her return her hired crutches-(she has her own) and left. 

I accompanied her teen son into his counselling appointment, talked to the psychologist as he is a new patient, then left them to discuss things. 

It was so much walking and in and out of cars that my own knees were quivering. Di's pain level was off the charts as it is difficult to get in and out of our car- it is high. She begged me to not undergo knee surgery myself. (I have both knees with torn ligaments) She didn't have to beg much. I don't like pain.

Today I am just resting and making a stew in my slow cooker. That's the best I can do today. Fibromyalgia is a wicked task master and a nasty dictator. 

Stating your name and business

As you know, we have just moved and along with a new home, comes some new things to add to the decor.

Chris and I love this door mat. This verse is one of our favourites and when we saw it we wanted it. It can be personalised to add your family name.

It looks lovely at the front door. We still have pictures to be hung and some flat packs of furniture to make up. The unpacking itself is almost finished.

The plan is to gradually go through room to room and gradually declutter. But this will depend on my spoons. I have another fibromyalgia flare.

But we have been finding that even a concerted effort of 5 minutes at a time followed by a rest and a cup of tea has paid off. Pacing is critical with fibromyalgia and heart failure.

I am in the process of getting an i-Roomba robotic vacuum cleaner to help with the floors. This house is quite large and the passage alone is as long as a cricket pitch...

Neither Chris or I can vacuum these days and I am hoping that the i-Roomba will save on money to employ a helper to come clean the house for me. I will let you know how we go.

Happily, the robotic vac can manage both tiles and carpet without skipping a beat, so it will be able to keep our lovely door mat free of dust bunnies. 

Meant to be noticed, I don't want visitors to our home seeing the mat dirty- not when it's proclaiming our faith and intention of having a holy home. It's all about stating your name and business! 

We really like our new house

 

I pushed myself today to do some work and unpack. I know it's not the best thing I can do with a fibromyalgia flare, but I need to get my home organised. We are about two-thirds unpacked. 

But of course the cooking, cleaning, dishes and washing have to be kept up and I managed to get the kitchen cleaned and a load of washing done. 

My daughter Dianne came home from hospital after her knee replacement. She's doing really well, praise God. 

Chris isn't feeling too great so I have to wait for the heavier things to be unpacked. We really like our new house.

We need to talk

So I am aging, overweight, have had over 50 kidney stones and 5 surgeries to remove them when they were impacted, and have given birth to 6 children.

Because of this, I used to find that a sneeze could have disastrous results, causing me embarrassment and discomfort as I wet myself. So much so, that I went to a physiotherapist who taught me how to exercise my pelvic floor using Kegel exercises.   They helped me quite a lot.

Nothing else has changed - one cannot change the past- but the only difference was my consistent Kegel exercising. This is for men as well as women, I was told. Anyway, I recommend them to everyone who has stress incontinence.

However, as much as Kegels have helped me, I have noticed that when I am in a flare of fibromyalgia, often I rediscover the joys of stress incontinence. 

It seems to me that fibromyalgia weakens my muscles in my pelvic floor and causes lack of control of the bladder. Just another problem fibro brings that many don't recognise or talk about.

I have purchased some undergarments that absorb urine yet look like normal underwear  I wear them when I am in a fibromyalgia flare, and they do a great job. (There are similar ones for men) It seems lately as I am in almost a constant state of flaring, that I am wearing them more often. 

It's just another pain for us Fibromites to endure, and I hope by sharing about this, it helps you if you have the same problem. It's nothing to be ashamed of and it's something we need to talk about.

More spoons to enjoy life.

We have just moved and we are both quite tired still. Although the house is functional, there's still a lot of unpacking to do.

This weekend, two of our grandchildren wanted to come see us and give us their verdict of the new house. Knowing that memories are all we will have once they are grown, we agreed to have them.

Although I am suffering from a bad fibromyalgia flare, I got dressed and stayed up in order to spend time with them.

We cooked lunch together and watched family videos of when they were first born and growing up. It was fun but it was also non taxing to my sore body. 

Today I am expecting a lady to come clean for a couple of hours. She did such a good job of cleaning our old house for our bond return, that I asked her if she would like to do a regular clean for us once a fortnight. She agreed.

With my poor daughter suffering from fibromyalgia as well and now living two minutes away, she also agreed to clean her house after ours each fortnight as well.

Both my daughter and I are finding just cooking, cleaning our kitchen, doing washing, grocery shopping, running errands like going to the chemist, planning finances and feeding our pets is enough of a job. We need some extra help.

There's very little help here for chronically ill people who can't do housework. What little we did get has been stopped since a new government has taken over the reins. So we have to pay privately.

I am grateful that I can save enough each fortnight to afford a cleaner's help. It not only keeps my home clean, but gives me more spoons to enjoy life.

 

Out of my comfort zone.

I am so exhausted right now. We have just moved house and as expected, I have welcomed a new fibromyalgia flare.

Having fibromyalgia for 23 years, I knew it would end like this, but in life some things are unavoidable and you just have to go with it.

So I sit here writing to you, trying to wind down enough to actually fall asleep. I have succeeded in making the home functional but there's much to still be done.

It will have to wait until tomorrow. As long as I have clean clothes for tomorrow and some clean cups and plates, it will have to suffice.

I hate moving so much, but I do love the house we have moved to and I am hoping the next tenants feed the birds and stray feral cat who comes to dine. I will miss them.

Wednesday I need to go to our doctor, so we will hand the keys in to the real estate then. Then they can inspect it and show prospective tenants through.

It looked lovely after the cleaners had been yesterday and the carpet cleaner's spray was perfumed so nicely. It was hard work for me to get to this point, but as I said, it was necessary. 

I cleaned and packed like a pro and we expect to get our bond or security money back with no problems. My muscles are so weak now but I think the results of my effort should pay off even though I was out of my comfort zone. 

 

On a wing and a prayer

We have been busy looking for another home to rent. It's been a nightmare. There aren't many homes to rent and when we apply, we are vying with about 20 other people for the same home.

Most days we have to go to look at these houses and as we are in the country, it is at least an hour's drive each day. I am exhausted.

So much exhaustion is hard to take, especially when it brings on a fibromyalgia flare. But as in lots of things in life, it just has to be done.

I think the most stressful part is actually securing a property to move in to. The actual move is not so bad, and this time we will be paying my grandson to help us move.

With the fifth wheel and tow vehicle sold, we are in a position to get someone to do the move for us and it's especially important with our failing health to enlist help this time.

We are going to miss the birdlife here for sure, but with us being in our 70's, we have decided that we need to be closer to family and hospitals if we have an emergency.

This house is old and has no insulation and is incredibly cold and it's our winter now. With the price of electricity going up on July first, we won't be able to afford the heating in our all electric dwelling.

We are feeling the cold and are looking forward to ducted heating again.

Today there's no house viewings as it's Saturday. I have used the time to catch up on washing and I have two slow cookers going with different meals in them.

I am contemplating using Prednisolone for a few days so that my neck and jaw pain (TMJ) abates. I don't know if it will help my muscle pain in my shoulder and upper pain, but it can't hurt.

Today is the first day for awhile that I have been able to post as my muscles feel like they're tearing. But I just wanted to touch base and tell you what's happening in our part of the world at the moment.

Next week is another day of house hunting and tonight I feel like I am running on a wing and a prayer.

 

It's a pain in the neck

 

Lately I have been trying to keep off the computer. I have had a horrid fibromyalgia flare and I suspect along with neck and shoulder pain, I have also got TMJ and polymyalgia rheumatica back as well.

We  recently sold our GMC Sierra ute and with no more vehicles needing a driveway to park on, we have turned our attention to finding another rented home. It has proven to be a nightmare.

There are not many affordable homes to rent and we find we are vying with up to 20 different people at a viewing, all hoping to get the same property. It is terribly stressful.

I think the stress has exacerbated my fibromyalgia. I have been clenching my jaw and this has seen my TMJ return. Without a blood test to check ESR creatines and so on, I can't say that my PMR has returned, but judging from the pain and inability to raise my arms, I would not be surprised.

I have done 5 loads of washing and dryed it in the dryer as it's too painful to hang it outside. I have run the dishwasher and been to the chemist to pick up my Januvia for my diabetes. Just that small bit of work has exhausted me. My spoons have left the building.

Lately I have been thinking it isn't worth moving, but the possums in the roof wake me up with their thumpings and scratchings and the cold weather has meant that central heating is calling my name and beckoning me to a newer more modern abode.

Just typing to you has stirred up all my sore muscles, and it's traveled down my arm. So I will be taking some paracetamol Osteo soon and maybe I'll be having a nana nap.

Fibromyalgia, PMR or plain arthritis makes for a bad day by any name. Whatever ails me, it boils down to the fact that today, it's a pain in the neck. 

 

He's feeling fairly ordinary.

It's been a busy day today. I have a broken off tooth that needs to come out. We had to be at the dentist's by 8.30am and it was an hour long drive. I was being fitted in as an emergency and was warned I could be waiting for up to 2 hours to get seen. 

Two hours passed by waiting and I was then told they couldn't see me today. They gave me a list of dentists I could see but it was too late to be seen today. 

So we drove about an hour away to see a house that we have applied for to rent. It's so nice and the inspection is tomorrow afternoon at 5pm. I hope we are successful. We have told the landlord we are looking and he was fine. 

When I got home I rang a few dentists on the list and I have an appointment midday Thursday for an extraction. My tongue is sore as the tooth is quite sharp. With my fibro flaring and TMJ, I am just about out of my tree with pain. 

My twin sister and my son have Covid and continue to feel sick, but she's feeling a little better, but my son has man flu. I am so glad Chris and I haven't got it....

I am already in my PJ's with my electric blanket on.  I have rung my son to see how he is before I go to bed.  Not so good. He's feeling fairly ordinary. 

 

More than a cake

So yesterday was my 69th birthday. We went to my twin sisters & my sons house for lunch to celebrate.

I really appreciated my sons' effort at the surprise cake he made for us. He's never made a cake in his life. We sang Happy birthday but we all decided not to light 69 candles in case it set the smoke detectors off. He put a few on for traditions sake.

We bought some KFC and enjoyed the family feast barrell. We had just enough chicken to feed four adults and we found we wouldn't need to have a cooked dinner.

This worked out well as I was suffering with a fibromyalgia flare and in fact almost didn't make it to their place for lunch. You know how it is: you arrange something for the next day, and you don't have any spoons when you wake up.

But as Chris pointed out, he was driving and I didn't have to do anything except sit there. So I went.

The trip is one and a half hours each way and I was so tired on the way home that I fell asleep in the car, garotting myself on the seat belt.

So not having to cook when I got home was a blessing. We just had some fruit and a cup of tea. It was enough.

My son lives with my twin who is ill with lupus. He's her carer. He cooks plain meals but never has baked a cake before. So when he brought out his birthday cake, I was more than a little surprised: and the other surprise was that it tasted good as well!

As we blew out the candles, his face was glowing with pride and satisfaction. I saw more than cake yesterday: I saw love!