I am already there!

   

In a few days I will be turning 71. It's been a bumpy ride punctuated with bursts of hard work in raising 5 children punctuated with the misery of chronic illness adding to the joy.

I think it's normal to feel tired in your seventies, but when one has fibromyalgia, polymyalgia, heart disease, spinal problems, diabetes and pulmonary hypertension as constant companions, well- it makes me tired just thinking of doing the smallest task.

Lately I have been reflecting on my life and trying to simplify it even more than it is now. And I have done a few things to avoid feeling false guilt and perfectionism.

I have unfollowed all my online groups for cooking, housework and household tips and decluttering. I still do these things, but at a snail's pace. I don't have to add to my perfectionism by fueling it.

I have also unfollowed all my feeds for pregnancy, childbirth and breastfeeding as it tends to make me nostalgic for something that is no longer a part of my life.

Similarly, I have gotten rid of household check lists and calenders about homemaking routines. They never work for me as I am so often out of spoons due mainly to fibromyalgia flares.

All my married life I have written out meal menus but now that Chris is very often not hungry or at least is very picky, I must cook to adapt to his fancies for dining thus invalidating my menu plan..

Always an Aldi girl, I now shop for groceries totally online, visit my doctor via phone consult, order  my prescriptions online and pay all my bills online.  

I rarely leave the house these days. Everything is slowing down for me these days and I need it to stay that way. 

Even with help once a fortnight for housecleaning, I find just running the home during the two weeks between cleans physically taxing. 

As I said, I think it's OK to slow down when you age...and I am no longer like the fairy godmother... managing my home easily and without much effort. 

I just have to accept that like the fairy godmother I am not getting old: I am already there!