Wednesday 19 April 2023

The spirit is willing

 



So I decided to take a bath today. No mean feat when one is chronically ill or disabled. It turned out to be a big mistake.

Chris helped me get into the bath as it's pretty high. I no longer have my bath lift  so that made things a bit harder again.

It was so difficult to make my knees bend enough to sit down in the water, but when I finally was in, the water was so soothing. I lay there for about 40 minutes, just luxuriating in it.

The loofah did a marvellous job of exfoliating my body and once again, I was so glad to actually be able to bathe.  Then came the hardest part: getting out.

I tried every way to get out without kneeling on my sore knees, but in the end, I had to. There was no other way. It hurt like crazy!

Today my knees are aching and it is with sadness that I realised-(not for the first time) that it will have to be showers from now on for me.

I have no painkillers here so I am just taking paracetamol... which is pretty much useless for strong pain.

So I have made a short list today for chores I want to do.

I have put away the online groceries that came this morning.
I have done a load of washing that is in the dryer.
I have a slow crocker full of pork sweet and sour rice for dinner tonight.


After all these years of chronic illness, mainly fibromyalgia and shuermanns disease, I think I have worked out how many spoons I can save during a bad day.

As it is written," The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak!" Matthew 26:41  Indeed it is! 


Tuesday 18 April 2023

No spoons required



So yesterday was a really good day. In spite of my fibromyalgia flaring and angina. But it's because of those things that today has been so good.

My diary showed a doctors' appointment to attend, then the chemist for scripts and then the inevitable grocery shop for the week. A full day for a chronically ill person.

I thought it through and decided to ring the clinic and change a face to face consult with a phone one. Then I rang the chemist to advise them that the script I owed them for some blood pressure tablets would be coming in the afternoon. Then I arranged the medicines to be delivered to me.

Then grabbing a cup of tea, I did my online shop and arranged delivery of it for tomorrow. And I played Candy Crush until the doctor rang me.

He arranged for the escripts to be sent directly to our chemist. I made another cup of tea as the doorbell rang- the girl with our medicines delivered them very promptly.

Cooking a simple meal, I found I had energy to work on my crochet project until bedtime. I had plenty of energy as all the errands had been done with no spoons required.





Today's the day of salvation

 


I think most of us believers feel that God is slow in coming back for us, and we are frustrated and depressed as the world is a sad place.

I have studied eschatology and I believe that the LORD is coming for His Bride- us soon! very soon.

Let that blessed hope buoy you up. It does me. He is at the gates... Just keep trusting in Him for He loves us... look up my friend. Our redemption is nigh.

God's wrath is for the unbelievers and Israel to recognise the Saviour they rejected. We are not going through the Tribulation.

We leave soon. Look up... I will save you a seat at the Marriage Supper.... Maranatha! Choose joy. we are blessed!

If you don't know Jesus as LORD, you can be Rapture ready by being saved. You don't want to be left behind. Today's the day of salvation... don't leave it too long.



© Glenys Robyn Hicks



“Because you have kept My command to persevere, I also will keep you from the hour of trial which shall come upon the whole world, to test those who dwell on the earth. Revelation 3:10

Sunday 16 April 2023

I am no longer a bunny!


 
So Easter has come and gone and so have all my spoons! I have been under the weather all over Easter and have a constant fibromyalgia flare, coupled with spinal pain.

With moving the homemaking help for the elderly stopped and it would take a long time to get it all arranged. We have decided to enlist a woman to clean for us fortnightly again.

This lady is very efficient and friendly as well and although we enlisted her for once a month cleaning, the truth is I need her fortnightly. I can maintain our home in between her visits, but with once a month, the house is needing a more thorough clean and therefore took more than the two hours I hired her to clean.

As always, I hate needing to have help these days, and Chris is too unwell to help me. It is what it is..

You would think that with having back pain for forty years and fibromyaglia and angina for twenty, that I would be more gracious to myself. I should be accepting my lot, but being a woman, I still find my perceived worth as a homemaker is dictated by how fast I spin my wheel without help.

So with my 70th birthday here in a few weeks, I am just going to have to accept my handicaps and be merciful to myself.

I should be glad that I have a husband who agrees to hiring help. A lot of women don't. So I will just stop the pity party and enjoy this season where we can afford her...

And also, when she comes, I am not going to clean the house before she comes... I am a  perfectionist, but no longer... where housework is concerned, I will get the help I need. I'm no longer a bunny!


© Glenys Robyn Hicks



God is my strength and power: and he maketh my way perfect. 2 Samuel 22:33

Monday 6 March 2023

You can rely on His Word



Scripture tells us that we will not know the day or hour that Jesus comes to take His Bride- the Church home with Him. We who are looking for His glorious appearing and being with Christ for eternity are longing for the Day. And so we should be.

“However, no one knows the day or hour when these things will happen, not even the angels in heaven or the Son himself. Only the Father knows"  Matthew 24:36

Many of us are experiencing our own tribulations as the world is cast into the shadow of the great Tribulation, and we are tired of living in this sin-filled, ungodly world. We need to keep not only our eyes looking up, but our hearts. 

As in the days of Noah, so shall it be in the final days before the Rapture also known in the Bible as the Harpazo and  Rapturo. (Yes it is mentioned in the scriptures). We need to keep the faith, keep fighting the good fight and keep our spirits and heart in longing for our Beloved to come for us. And He is coming! 

What can we be doing as we wait for Jesus to take us Home?

  • I believe we should be in prayer for those people suffering under authorities such as the Taliban and for all those Christians who are in danger. 
  • We need to intercede for the Ukrainians who are being invaded as we speak.
  • We should be praying for those who are still unsaved. 
  • Keeping the faith can be difficult for some, especially as the world gets darker. We need to pray for ourselves too.

How can we overcome the anxiety and depression these end days bring?

  • We should bring our thoughts and minds under the control of the Holy Spirit by focussing on good things that are still here
  • We must remember that Christ is in control, no matter how bad a situation becomes.
  • We must bring everything we see, hear and read in to the light of the Word and we must remember that all these things, though disturbing, are temporary.
  • We must maintain an attitude of gratitude for all things in our life and dwell on God's goodness.
  • We simply must be a person of worship and praise.
  • We must be in the Word.
  • We must remember that Jesus has promised to take us Home before the Great Tribulation. 

Because you have kept My command to persevere, I also will keep you from the hour of trial which shall come upon the whole world, to test those who dwell on the earth- Revelation 3:10

The end is in sight and we are tired. We long for Jesus to take us to be with Him. We are continuing to fight the good fight. We are running the race and our Saviour cheers us on. 

We are being His faithful servants even in the end days.. whilst watching and waiting. Even so, come Lord Jesus! Maranatha! 

Those who don't know Jesus yet....There's not much time left, my friends. Get on the Ark and get saved now.

He is coming- and soon. Accept Christ now!  God is fulfilling all things and it must come to pass. You can rely on His Word.
 


 

Sunday 5 March 2023

The Dentist-a saga of dread

 



The Dentist - a saga of dread

Sick with dread and anticipation my hands dripping with perspiration,

I rigidly sat wide-eyed with fear in that most abominable of all places-

The Dentist's chair... 

He must have thought me a fool; overhead pictures from nursery school,

And models flashing perfect pearly whites in an effort to allay the dread and fright

Of what I knew would be a horrible ordeal their pretty pictures wouldn't make less real-

My fear of the Dentist... 

The cool decor was aesthetically pleasing, designed to be for the releasing

Of jangled nerves and whites of fear-filled eyes, every effort made to disguise

That this was the home of the Marquis de Sade whose thrills were gained by the screams I made

in moments spent in the barbaric hands of one most thought of as a 'caring' man-

The Dentist... 

Oh, he cared for me in his own strange way by his actions and the words he'd say-

The intimate probing of every tooths' surface , his caring advice on how to brush them till flawless; 

but I thought it was a little queer how he got excited when in my mouth he'd peer,

And I felt suspicious of a guy whose great delight was to become aroused by the shape of my bite...

And it turned me up as he became turned on as he explored every tooth with his forked prong

And announced with relish and fiendish delight that I had decay in the top tooth on the right,

And I looked upon him through sunglassed eyes which hopefully  would enable me to disguise

The loathing and dread I felt at his touch which still was quite awful despite rubber gloves

And I felt the fear of him come as a great heat, knowing that now Sade was in for a treat-

I hated with the hatred I reserved for him alone as into my enamel he swiftly honed...

How strange that his breathing was so relaxed and so sure and mine was so fast that I wanted to roar

And tell him to stop that I was suffocating, but I knew that it was no use remonstrating,

For  this torturous bard had a job to be done, and I panted and sweated as if I had just run

As I wanted to do before I entered his door, for my tooth had stopped aching the night before,

And I purposed right then and there in my heart to forgo all sugars and sweets for a start,

And to floss and to brush till my little gums bled, to avoid this man who filled me with dread- 

This most hateful of men,

The Dentist... 

Through goggled protection his eyes suddenly glinted-and I knew from experience what they hinted-

The moment of fear to give me heart palpitations; the filling was so deep that I needed injections,

And my mouth which till then had dribbled quite freely, went dry as a chip as I acquiesced weakly,

And I gripped the side of the chair with such might that my perspiring hands sported knuckles of white

As he bored the needle right into my brain- (Well I guessed it was there from the amount of pain),

Then just as I felt it was too much to bear, I suddenly felt that my nose wasn't there,

And so I relaxed and dropped my arms and surrendered unwillingly into his charms,

And let him have his way with me, knowing gums and enamel his only interest to be,

And his sole desire and ultimate plan was to cleanse all teeth of the scourge of man-

My greatest foe and Sade's greatest delight, the one thing we agreed on, the one thing to fight-

Sade for the money and the thrill of the chase, me for the desperation in avoiding this place- 

The dentist's 

  

© Glenys Robyn Hicks  


Saturday 11 February 2023

Soon. Very soon!



Every night before I try to sleep, I pray that we will be raptured before dawn.... every morning as soon as I wake, I pray today will be the day.... Meanwhile, He is with us in Spirit..

To be with Him you must be born again. Read here to find out how to become a Christian.. Make the most important decision of your life and accept Christ while there's still time.

We will be with Him soon. Very soon.


©  Glenys Robyn Hicks  



Because he hath set his love upon me, therefore will I deliver him: I will set him on high, because he hath known my name. He shall call upon me, and I will answer him: I will be with him in trouble; I will deliver him, and honour him. With long life will I satisfy him, and shew him my salvation. -Psalm 91:14-16

Monday 16 January 2023

More than just a place to sleep




Recently someone asked why do we make our bed? I gave it some thought as I have recently been making my own bed daily, in spite of regularly going back into it for a nana nap. Here's a few thoughts on why I use my precious spoons to make my bed.

Physically its more comfortable to sleep in. 

Psychologically its more inviting.

It makes the room visually more esthetically pleasing.

The bed's the centrepiece of the room like in a painting. 

It gives the illusion of order and calm.

It uplifts my spirits when I come into my bedroom.

With fibromyalgia, angina and back problems, I make mine but often get back in it. So I remake it.

When I make it, I don't get on my knees as they are broken and I do not do hospital bed mitred corners. I pull up my top sheet, then turn back the minky blankets. With arthritic hands, the only tucks I do are at the bottom of the bed to secure the bedding...

But, being honest, I sometimes let it go when I have a fibro flare- being satified that the sheets and bedding is clean. But the majority of times, my beds are made. 

Beds are more comfortable made up or at least straightened and are more than a place to sleep.



Tuesday 27 December 2022

It makes my spoons quiver



So yesterday we had more family come for Christmas. We had a lovely lunch, feasting on the abundant leftovers from the feast on Christmas Day. 

Because I had pushed myself physically the day before, my fibromyalgia was flaring and my back was spasming because I had been on my feet preparing food for a long time. I was feeling overwhelmed.

I was feeling hospitable, it was just because of pain that the day was on a downer for me personally. I tried my best to be cheerful. We Fibromites and chronically ill people become consumate actors in playing the cheerful game.

My step-daughter was very gracious and helped me make teas and coffees and carve left over ham, and not for the first time, I was very grateful to her.

With 35C temperatures- 95F, I was also very grateful for our air conditioner. The dining area was very comfortable and we passed a pleasant day.

My little 4 year old great-granddaughter Evie came to me and asked me to show her my bedroom. So taking my hand, she led me to my room, looked at the ensuite, and declared, "Nana, I love your house, and I love you too!"  It made my day.

Her declaration of love warms my heart even now as I talk to you. I am sitting here in fibro pain with my two freshly broken purple toes throbbing. (I kicked the corner of the dining table leg, collecting two toes for the price of one.) But the happiness of my little lovely Evie's declaration overshadows even the pain today.

The house is tidy, the washing in the machine and the Christmas tree and decorations are put away. My robotic vacuums have been run today. We are now officially post Christmas.

We placed the tree still decorated into a closet that is empty, and should the LORD tarry, it will be a simple matter to reinstall it next year. Not that I really can imagine another Christmas right now. 

Quite simply, nice as it was, it makes my few remaining spoons quiver! 


Saturday 10 December 2022

Failing fast



You may have noticed I haven't been posting much lately. Fibromyalgia, heart disease, high blood pressure and now boils have taken over my body all at once.

My body is failing me and the fatigue is not only sapping my strength but my mental faculties. It is hard to formulate a sentence these days.

I have been to the doctor. My blood pressure meds have been increased (200/86) and that in itself makes me tired.

These days it takes me all my time to look after Chris and my home. Forget socialising.

I am on the strongest oral antibiotics, taking 9 a day. They have brought the boil on my spine to a head. I am waiting for it to pop itself, rather than try to squeeze it. Though I think I would die from the pain if we tried to do that. The boil is quite large.

I pace myself to try to eke out my meagre spoons but I find I just have to have a nana nap in the day to have enough spoons to cook dinner.

I am praying that I feel better for Christmas as we are having family here for lunch Christmas Day. Most certainly I will have to be stronger than what I am now. My body is failing fast.